Question by Yup just Me: Is it Mistake to have a baby now ?
am 25 and my hubby is 27 we are Married for almost 2 Years
we moved to another country directly after our wedding as my husband works there
he has a very good Job , we are financially stable for a young couple .
as for me , i dropped outta med school in the end of my 2nd year ( personal reasons ) and got a temporary job as an ( administrative assistant ) which later on became a full time job .
now i am doing nothing significant with my life , its hard to get a decent job where am living now
and my parents are pressuring me to go back to med school , which is impossible for me to do
i dont have the will to do it , and i have to admit that am not interested anymore
on top of that My mother stopped having real conversations with me since i left college , she keeps saying i don’t want u to be like me , just a housewife …
lately i started thinking about having a baby , its so not me
i notice kids a lot lately , and they just bring me joy and i cant stop thinking of having my own.
before i would panic just of the thought of having a kid … but not anymore !!!!
anyway …. i wish to have a baby maybe Next year
but my only fear is ( NOT HAVING A DEGREE )
will i regret having a baby without having a good job or at least a degree , something to help me stand on my feet if my life took another turn ??
Can i have a baby and still do something with my life ?
Answer by beverly
You can do anything you put your mind to, but you should NOT have a baby if you are not 1000% SURE that is what you and your husband want.
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
Question by myamallari: Citibank Mistake?
I filled in a student loan application and i got pre approved. i requested the forms be sent to be for an official signature. i found put i put the repayment loan “to pay while in school” instead of “deferred till graduating”, if i cross this out and put the deferred option, will this interfere with my pre approval?
Answer by Caroline
If you still have the form, why don’t you reprint it and fix it? If you’ve already sent it, call the offices up ASAP and tell them you want to change the option to defer until graduation.
What do you think? Answer below!
Are you a patient person? If not, do you think that you are destined to be impatient forever, or do you see parenting as the challenge that will strengthen your patience? Without patience, parenting is destined to be a frustrating experience, full of failure.
Lack of patience is such a huge factor in parenting poorly. We snap at our kids, only to regret it moments later, or rush by them when they are trying to get our attention. If you read the earlier article about the number one parenting mistake, lack of vision, you can easily see how having a strong vision for your family, and faith that you will get there, can help you be more patient. Yet like a muscle, patience can be developed, and parenting offers many opportunities for growth in patience.
In your vision of your family and yourself as a parent, hold an image of yourself as a very patient person.
If you are aware of how crucial patience is, that will help you become more patient. If you have the vision of parenting as nature’s way of growing us up wherever we are deficient, you will have the faith that you can become a patient person no matter how short-tempered you are now.
This was not an area of strength for me when I first became pregnant! Ironically I entered parenting a fairly impatient person. My impatience caused me a lot of pain; I was too hard on myself and everyone around me for our mistakes, especially when we failed to rectify our errors quickly. The concept of staying in the now was alien to me, and I often battled with depression about what was wrong with my life or anxiety about the future.
When my kids were babies, I was impatient to get on with my life.I found it hard to relax into the moment and just enjoy them.
I remember breaking a drawer by forcing it to open because of my impatience when it wouldn’t open properly. I also lacked vision and faith that I could become the patient person I needed to be in order to thrive and be happy looking after little, unpredictable, kids.
When their behavior issues began to surface, my impatience and lack of faith that I could become patient, caused me to blow up over issues such as fighting or not listening to me. Fortunately, my remorse when I was sharp with them and my determination to provide a calm, nurturing environment gave me the incentive to search for a better way to parent. As I began to mellow and trust that their basic goodness would triumph, the issues began to recede, and I found myself much more able to go with the flow.
Once you are committed to becoming a patient person, you will find the tools that you need. For me, patience grew as I did cognitive therapy for my depression and anxiety. I also did exercises to work on my temper, and learnt to literally count to 10. Another huge tool that I learned from Dr. Gordon Neufeld was to focus on the future and not the past. I began saying to the kids, “Next time would you please answer me so I know you heard me?” Whatever the tools you find work for you, if you trust you can become as patient as you need to be, you will find your way.
Like so many parenting lessons, becoming a patient person has made me dramatically happier. When I make plans with people and they change, I usually can roll with the changes. In fact, I find that the unexpected is usually a gift, an opportunity disguised as a negative, me not getting my way. I am extremely grateful to my kids for the opportunity to learn this valuable life skill that is so critical to happiness.
I’d love to hear your experience with patience and kids! Please email me or go to my website and share your views. Like so many parents nowadays, my initial instincts were skewed and caused me a lot of stress! I am indebted to Dr. Gordon Neufeld, developmental psychologist and best-selling author of Hold on to Your Kids. My passion is teaching other parents about his ground-breaking work, and helping you to be the great parent that you were meant to be. When you want parenting help, are you overwhelmed by the number of experts, and the diversity of styles and advice? That’s why I started the free Parenting Expert Teleseminar Series so that you can find out if you like a parenting expert’s approach, without committing much time or any money. You also get a chance to ask the expert your top parenting question. Then you can call in, or access the call via webinar, and listen to the expert answer the top questions we receive. Go to http://www.GreatParentingPractices.com to sign up for free access to parenting experts and to see who I’m interviewing next. Email info@GreatParentingPractices.com to let me know who you’d like to see on the series or what issue you’d like covered.